Basic Manipulative Strategy of a Psychopath

According to Drs. Hare and Babiak psychopaths are always on the lookout for individuals to scam, exploit or swindle. The psychopathic approach includes three phases:

1: Assessment phase

Some psychopaths are opportunistic, aggressive predators who will take advantage of almost anyone they meet, while others are more patient, waiting for the perfect, innocent victim to cross their path. In each case, the psychopath is constantly sizing up the potential usefulness of an individual as a source of money, power, sex or influence. Some psychopaths enjoy a challenge while others prey on people who are vulnerable. During the assessment phase, the psychopath is able to determine a potential victim’s weak points and will use those weak points to seduce.

2: Manipulation phase

Once the psychopath has identified a victim, the manipulation phase begins. During the manipulation phase, a psychopath may create a persona or mask, specifically designed to ‘work’ for his or her target. A psychopath will lie to gain the trust of their victim. Psychopaths’ lack of empathy and guilt allows them to lie with impunity; they do not see the value of telling the truth unless it will help get them what they want.

As interaction with the victim proceeds, the psychopath carefully assesses the victim’s persona. The victim’s persona gives the psychopath a picture of the traits and characteristics valued in the victim. The victim’s persona may also reveal, to an astute observer, insecurities or weaknesses the victim wishes to minimize or hide from view. As an ardent student of human behavior, the psychopath will then gently test the inner strengths and needs that are part of the victim’s private self and eventually build a personal relationship with the victim.

The persona of the psychopath – the “personality” the victim is bonding with – does not really exist. It is built on lies, carefully woven together to entrap the victim. It is a mask, one of many, custom-made by the psychopath to fit the victim’s particular psychological needs and expectations. The victimization is predatory in nature; it often leads to severe financial, physical or emotional harm for the individual. Healthy, real relationships are built on mutual respect and trust; they are based on sharing honest thoughts and feelings. The victim’s mistaken belief that the psychopathic bond has any of these characteristics is the reason it is so successful.

3: Abandonment phase

The abandonment phase begins when the psychopath decides that his or her victim is no longer useful. The psychopath abandons his or her victim and moves on to someone else. In the case of romantic relationships, a psychopath will usually seal a relationship with their next target before abandoning his or her current victim. Sometimes, the psychopath has three individuals on whom he or she is running game: the one who has been recently abandoned, who is being toyed with and kept in the picture in case the other two do not work out; the one who is currently being played and is about to be abandoned; and the third, who is being groomed by the psychopath, in anticipation of abandoning the current “mark”. Abandonment can happen quickly and can occur without the current victim knowing that the psychopath was looking for someone new. There will be no apologies, or at least no sincere apologies, for the hurt and pain the psychopath causes, because psychopaths do not appreciate these emotions.

from WIKIPEDIA

The above is textbook for what happened to me. I was spinning at the end during the Abandonment faze not understanding what was going on. His messages were so mixed. But thats what they count on. So while it was "on again" and "off again" with me he never took a stand about anything until I backed him into a corner. And while he was trying to "explain" his way out of it, he still blamed ME for the issue I had brought up. This of course is about all the furniture we had in storage that he let go to auction (email conversation available). And when I didn't reply to his answer he took that moment to send me the all eternal "break up" email (conversation available)

See, I really believe that the ONLY smart thing I did with this whole issue was keep to email conversations. They leave a trail. And if anyone within his "circle" or the "new supply" ever gets wind of this blog.....I have proof. I would love to hear of his "past" that he colored for his new wife. There is no way he told her the truth! LOL Who would tell someone they had just been "honeymooning" that there first wife divorced them for Fraud, their second wife (with their son) divorced them for lying and stealing, and that they "threw away" there third relationship because she wasn't "financially supportive" anymore? Oh, but things will be different with YOU right? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

From www.gettinbetter.com

Never will a Borderline take ownership of their failings/flaws. Never. Closure allows a meeting of souls, a healing acknowledgment of each person's part in the demise of the relationship, and an opportunity for both to learn from their mistakes. No such thing will ever exist for the Borderline. Oh, you may receive a perfunctory "I'm sorry," but there is never genuine remorse. So why is this, do you think?

Closure equals Ego Death to a Borderline. They're so fractured/fragile, they really can't manage any hint of abandonment or loss. They're so full of self-loathing, they can't handle anyone being aware of their shortcomings. Their defenses are deeply entrenched, automatic and reflexive--because they need them to survive. Point out your Borderline's weaknesses, and you might as well drive a stake through their heart--if they can take it in. Most cannot, so their denial remains. For you this can mean no harm, no foul.

So when your listening to their past, listen closely......

The best predictor of future behavior, is past behavior...................

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